In true weeble fashion..You can wobble a Frank but we don"t fall down :)

There are so many things i could be doing right now, laundry, house chores. But I miss blogging. There have been tons of things going on, none blog worthy I suppose. And since I love to make the reality a funfactuality and make people laugh, I haven't blogged. Sometimes it is hard to see the funny in things. Sometimes you just don't have the energy to repeat it. That's where I have been...exhausted.
Since November I have been sick or taking care of sick kids. Then of course the holidays came and went. In December and January I had two "procedures" at the gyno office, both of which were painful and exhausting. I just can't seem to get my mojo back.

I could not have gotten through any of this without my partner in crime, Prince Charming, of course! In the midst of all that has been holding me down our oldest went through his first rejection of sorts being cut from the baseball team. Dam i was pissed. Those coaches strung him along for 5 months of hard work and dedication only to be cut on the last day. Whatever..they don't deserve my sons dedication. They don't deserve my son. He has moved on, like we knew he would with strength and smarts. He is now a member of the JV tennis team for Dacula and we couldn't be prouder! Fu bb!!

Einstein has been chugging along with school and baseball. He seems to kinda float through the days. Middle school, up until about a week ago, hadn't really changed his "tude". well..that change came upon us like an elephant falling from the sky. One night while we all sat at the dinner table the hormone devil that had earlier taken over our oldest son..took hold of our Einstein. The night ended in Mama Frank exploding and he being grounded for a week. All in all it was a frustrating night. But at least he and I have come to grips with A. He is growing up. and B. I will win every time..I am louder..I don"t play that game..and I control the phone :).

DQ is getting older and more "tude" every day. I don't think I will make it to her graduation. She has chosen the road of argumentation, dramatization, frustration, annoyherbrothersatineverysituation, rollhereyesation, lotsofpermuation, wantingmakeuphaahaasonothappeningation, and last but not least mamayouaresoooowrongation. My kikherassation has been a permanant situation :)

so here we sit..February. A couple of months and it will be summer :) aaahhh sun&fun&fruity drinks on the porch..I can't wait.

Anyways..that is what has been going on. Ironically as I sit here and blog the middle school just called and Einstein is sick and needs to be picked up..rah!

I'll be back..I need to blog..it makes things so much better to get it out there..to who I have no clue. But at least if you are on my list of people to call back..you know why I haven't :)

Never say never...it will happen to you

You know those stories of mommies and daddies who leave their child in a car by accident? I sympathize with them, God only knows how busy and frantic they must be to have forgotten a CHILD...right? How quiet was that child..and how much was that parent just engulfed in that quiet moment where they could actually think for a second in peace...maybe that's it..they just STOP thinking!
I do not pass judgement on these people..awful. I wouldn't think that that would happen to me..I'm far to routined...and i have very very noisy children..both my own and my backseat posse :).

So now that I've said that would NEVER happen to me..I have an awful..devastating.. story to share with you..

Mammee had to go back to Boston for what we hope is a short visit. So the past week was emotional (I hate when she leaves..she hates going..it was pms week). It was my first full week of the Back Seat Posse going back to pre-school and getting the scheduled tweaked to perfection for drop offs and pickups. I love to be there and back and there and back everyday at the same exact time (I told you I was routined). My beloved chihuahua, Franki Frank, loves to go in the car with me for car rider lines. He can be anywhere in the house in a deep sleep and as soon as i grab my keys and open the garage door he will rush through the house with the greatest of speed to be the first at the door..no matter who he trips on the way.

This day in particular we had reached our last pickup of the day, and boy were we all glad to be home..it was hot and we were all exhausted from a long week. There was very entertaining conversation going on in my backseat (as most days) with the BP. They came home with paper crowns on their heads and it was decided by one that they were all queens..to which the other stated "no..you are a boy..I am a girl..you are the king and I am the queen" to which the one said "we can all be queens!!!!" gleeee and happiness filled the car and rainbows and unicorns fell from the sky:))) Homeward bound we were...we get home..get out of the car..go have lunch.

As I was finishing up placing (prepared already on the plates as I am a little routined) their lunches on the table and they are washing their hands I FROZE IN MY SHOES!!!!! OMG I DIDN"T....NOOOOOO.... my heart started to race and i started to swet. I thought I was gonna vomit and pee all at the same time. MY FRANKI FRANK WAS IN HIS CARSEAT (yes he has a carseat for safety..don't judge) IN THE CAR ALLLLL ALOOOOOONE!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I rushed into the dark, hot, scary garage and retrieved my beloved out of his car seat(he had fallen asleep)...realized he was still perfect..smooched him agazillion times and went into the house. As I was appologizing to my chi one of my BP's says (gasp)"Ms'Telly did you leave Franki in the car all alone! O MY GOODNESS" To which my mother comes running down the stairs to share in the laughter that had errupted in the kitchen..from the children. I was devistated and swore her to secrecy. This lasted till my family got home and she blabbed to EVERYONE what I had done..bad mammee!!

He is OK..I am OK..apparently I need to get him a bell.
There in lies why I will never say again..."I would never"....my poor baby

O NO HE DIDNT.......!!!!!!

O yes...he did!! I'll give him this..he is brave AND stupid all at the same dam time.
I have indeed been in his shoes and remember making the same tragic mistake, but I thought that I had hid my "bitchiness" pretty well from my kids till now, I guess I was very wrong!

Up in my bathroom tonight and 14 comes in to ask if he can "go hang out" at the town park. Well of course my response was no..I mean last time I checked he wasn't a hoodlum or a degenerate or a teenage girl lookin to be a baby mama, soooo no real need to be at the park hanging out right? He didn't like my answer..to which he received a louder answer..honestly I was surprised he was going to push the issue because he has NEVER been allowed to go there, and every time we pass through the park I comment on how lucky those cops are that they get to spend the afternoon with some failure of a parents pain in the ass child.

The argument continued and he pushed until Mama Frank reared her ugly head. I don't let her out often...but dammit if you push to hard..it's like Sybil...So he walks away all disgusted and with alllllllll the bravery and strength in his lil heart he announces for the first time in his life OUT LOUD ...(brace yourself)...

"YOUR BEING SUCH A BITCH"


I don't know what he said next..something like "no I didnnt" "no..i swear" "noooooooooaaaaaaaa" the details are sketchy and really it doesn't matter cause we allllllllllllllll know what he said. And I think I was yelling..or my head exploded..again..not clear.

He is still alive..he is still walking. I told him during our "chat" while cleaning up the kitchen after dinner (yes I let him eat)that this was his one and only pass outta hell...but next time he says it to brace himself for the ass whippin.

One good thing...I guess I do not have to hide my "bitchiness" anymore..gloves are off now baby!!! :)))) BRING IT

Wake up parents...teachers are a gift!!

There are many professions that society doesn't give two shits about. I am going to talk about teachers tonight. I have been seeing great, wonderful, and talented teachers getting the shitty end of the stick and I am sick of it. My heart goes out to them and I just want to hug them tight and say "THANK YOU" with hopes that my heart spills out all the love I'm feeling for them.

You are a gift and I thank you for the following...

Teaching my child to read
Teaching my child to do complicated math
Teaching my child how to handle a bully
Keeping my child safe
Teaching my child "out of the box out of the textbook" lessons that will forever stick with them.
Thank you for being there on a bad day and understanding no one is perfect
Thank you for spending your OWN money on school supplies the county or parents did not supply you with
Thank you for coming in on your days off and working for my child's education
Thank you for taking time out of your family life to work on projects for my child
Thank you for putting up with budget/job/supply/money cuts for the sake of my child
Thank you for supporting me as a parent
Thank you for having extra snacks for the children who have parents who don't supply them with one .... because they don't have time to pack it
Thank you for making sure no one harms my child while in school
Thank you for putting up with administrative bureaucracy
Thank you thank you thank you

Most importantly .... Thank you thank you thank you for loving my child, my baby, my true life love...you are all gifted, wonderful, beautiful and amazing people you teachers! And remember...for that one parent who dumps all over you for one reason or another..there are those of us who love you and appreciate you!!!

TOY STORY 4 ATTACK OF THE BITCH DOLLS

Ya..this is what I woke to this morning compliments of my daughter...which ironically has been re-named from DQ to Napom (bomb).

Last night Hubby and I went out to dinner with some friends. We never go out so this was a big deal. Why don't we go out often you ask? Well, we never really had anyone I trusted with my kids to babysit. There was also the fear of ~ when the kids are so bad will the babysitter leave them and run like Forest Gump? Then I would have to explain to the parents of this teenager why they disappeared..not fun ~...So we very seldom go out. Last night we did though and I think maybe my kids thought I was gone forever..never to return..therefore had free range to do WHATEVER!

Apparently Napom had this roaming through her head last night. Hopes that mama was never to return. OR......

Last night she and her bff were playing quietly in her room. American Girls were the toy of choice... dressing..undressing..brushing hair..conversations about boys and all that dramatic girl shit. Out of NOWHERE comes the Barbie brigade. The girls freeze with fear saying to each other "omg". The Barbies tell the American Girls that they better "back off: and "find some other room to play in".."this is their territory". The American girls simply said with the shake of their head and a swagger of the hip "make me".

From here it's sketchy, I'm assuming that the American Girls held Napom & bff down while the barbies emptied the closet and then they came together for a short time and locked Napom & bff in the closet. American Girl looks at Barbie and says "BRING IT BITCH"

At this point all hell broke loose. Plastic pieces and silicon boobs flying through the air. Barbies clothes were scattered about and thrown everywhere, American Girl must have a pretty good arm and should consider going out for softball. American Girl accessories were stuffed under the bed and in the doll house. I guess Barbie had had it with those girls and decided to hide all her shit. Ken OF COURSE was sitting pretty in his container not having been disturbed..this had to have been his fault.
It was an all out "Toy Story 4 Attack of the Bitches".

The dolls pulled an all nighter occasionally insulting a build a bear to tears. The dolls in the doll house ran and hid underneath the house in hopes that the tornado wouldn't take their house and all their belongings. Barbie was swinging from the ceiling fan kicking American Girl in the head screaming "you think you're all that you stuck up hore!!!" (They of course awoke to an all out devastation of their surroundings, but the house was spared...thank God for that!)

Webkins took cover under the bed...sharing the space with alllllll the books from the book shelf. Junie B Jones watched in horror as American Girl had Barbie in a head lock yelling "make me you anorexic slut!!!"

As the fight between the bitches continued into the morning hours they began to get tired, they decided to call a temporary truce for now, with of course the understanding that if the other got outta line they were gonna have to get all up their shit again.

Napom and bff were then let out of the closet only to discover that all hell had broken loose and a war was had. O and Mama Frank was home :)

so.....I went to Kohl's with a good friend for some retale therapy and walked out with alllll this :)

RFLMAO

We were in the car on the way back from TN. The kids are in the back listening to their ipods and we are just enjoying the quiet. Here comes one of those "I am so ashamed of my parent skills" moments people...So outta nowhere Ali starts singing out loud. She has her ear buds in so of course she can't hear herself. And much to our amazement new all the words to the songs she was singing OUT LOUD!!

We have 5 ipods here in the Frank household. There is a series of music..rap..country, pop, hard rock, christian. We love music! Ok..so there are times when I have just had it with the "mommy i need" "mommy can I have" and my steal wall of mommy "NO" is down. And when DQ comes to me for the gazillionth time asking me for something I'll just say.."whatever". Apparently that wall came down every fkn time she asked for a song on her ipod...cause OMG the songs she was singing...OMG!!!!

I can tell you that Kelly Clarkson has some serious rage issues...that the Black Eyed Peas need to change the word "phunk" in their song...Taylor Swift is beautiful and wonderful and I was thankful that she was on DQ's ipod. The Dixie Chicks really should consider some therapy and maybe "making nice" would be a good decision for all of us. Beyonce needs to find a man who stores his stuff to the right..maybe she wouldn't be such a bitch. Flo Rida needs to just stop....and should consider staying off the merry go rounds. Gwen Stefani is someone I am glad I never met in high school..Hollerback to someone who cares sister. Ke$sha apparently wants sex in her car..blahblahblah..o my! Hannah Montana has a very distorted vision of what she means to...well the world!!!!!

Set anything to a catchy tune and you are signing shit! My daughter sang about sex drugs and rock&roll...and had no clue what she was singing!!!!I can tell you that her ipod is now a G rated electronic device that now ONLY gets updated by Mama Frank!!! O MY!!!!!

Huh..look at that..monkey see monkey do!

ok so here is an observation...

Your child wants to play a sport..you sign them up and pay a fee right? Ok..so they go to practice, pay their dues, do the fundraisers right? And everyone pays the same amount RIGHT? Then how come there are kids sitting on the bench not playing? How come there are kids not being able to participate in games? I'll give you a second to think about it.....

I'll tell you why...it's called "daddy ball" that by the way is a nasty word here in the south "daddyball". Do you remember the kids in school that were obnoxious? You know the ones..they were in the "in" crowd and rubbed it in every ones face..they had everything and flaunted it. They were the sore looses. Ever wonder what happened to them? They became parents of children who wanted to play sports. Their kids are the ones getting the game time. These parents are up the coaches butt's...and most of the time (in my experience as a team mom) they are behind on their team dues..and are always late to practice.

We haven't played ball for about 2 years now, for many reasons, one was the discusting attitude shown by parents(by the way the kids act just as bad as the parents) and coaches. We are now back at the park and have lucked out with an amazing coach. We have high hopes for fantastic frigin fall :)